Thursday, November 23, 2006

Oh, I Thought She Said "Wired"

The fabulous Sista Smiff has admitted that she might have some "eccentricities and called me out to share my weirdness. So here are 6 weird things about CeeElCee.

1. I have freakishly long toes and can tie a shoelace and make a paper airplane with my feet. My second toe is as long as my pinkie. We're talking baby hands here, people. Sorry to gross you out. These "talents" did come in handy back when I was a summer camp counselor at the Cumberland Museum and the projector would break down. Sitting in front of a pile of kiddies hopped up on Hawaiian Punch and calming them down by doing toe tricks is a surreal memory, even today twenty some odd years later.

2. When I watch a dvd, I always watch the special features before the movie. This includes the trailer of the movie I'm about to spend two hours watching. Yes, it does drive RUABelle batty.

3. I have taught hundreds of people how to juggle and how to rappel. Not at the same time. I have a proprietary method to teach even the most spastic folks how to juggle three tennis balls. Ask me about it sometime.

4. I can play three songs on the banjo strictly by finger memory. I took lessons for a couple of months when I was in high school. Once I learned how to play "Foggy Mountain Breakdown," I had achieved what I wanted out of the instrument so I quit going. I can still pick up a banjo and play "Foggy Mountain", "Cripple Creek" and "Bile That Cabbage Down" but I have no idea what I'm doing when I play it. I tend to just stare off into space, slack-jawed and on the verge of drooling like some sort of "Rocking Horse Winner" while my fingers play the rolls and execute the hammer-ons and pull-offs. Call me a savant. Or and idiot.

5. I was in Jim Varney's first movie, "Doctor Otto and the Riddle of the Gloom Beam." This was pre-Ernest. It was very bad, but it is available on dvd. I'm the guy in the science fair scene wearing the maroon faux-Members Only jacket who gets a table full of tires dumped on him the robot science project that has run amok. No, I didn't get paid extra for the stunt work. I am in the credits though, and I did get to go to the gala opening at the Belle Meade Theatre.

6. When I sing along with a song, I like to sing harmony parts instead of the melody. And not even the traditional harmonies. F'd up harmonies. This makes me good to have along for a small acoustic gig, but horrible at karaoke. I used to play the tuba, so I sing the bass line to the "Start Spangled Banner." The rest of my musically formative years were spent listening to bluegrass, so that leads to other pretty messed-up harmonies as well. You should hear my high lonesome version of Creed. Be very afraid.

So there, now you know six more weird things about me.

How about you, Sara , Sara , FishWreck , Jag , Knuck and Kosmo? Tag, you're it.


Blogger Lynnster said...

The fact that you, Newscoma, and myself have now all referenced our freakishly long & oddly deformed toes on this 6 Weird Things meme is not likely going to do much to improve the outsider view of "inbred Tennessee rednecks"... oops! Heh.

2:00 PM  
Blogger newscoma said...

Mad Skillz you have with those toes.
Mine just look funny.

5:30 PM  
Anonymous sista smiff said...

What's up with all you freaks and your jacked up toes?

5:42 PM  
Anonymous sista smiff said...

I hum the harmony too. We have got to have a Blogging Karaoke night.

5:44 PM  
Anonymous fishwreck said...

But can you play "Rocking Horse Winner" on the banjo with those toes while singing odd harmony, watching the special features on the "Doctor Otto and the Riddle of the Gloom Beam" DVD and juggling carabiners?

9:17 PM  
Blogger Busy Mom said...

The toes, I, um, no...not going there. It's a holiday and all.

I waved at you at the Sewanee exit a couple of hours ago.

I can juggle, can you teach me how do do throws between people?

9:20 PM  
Blogger Angella said...

Hmmm, not sure what to say, but thought I would leave a comment. The toes are a hit, by the way. I shall paint mine and my daughters' toes tomorrow in your honor.

Happy Toe/Thanksgiving Banjo Boy.

10:58 PM  
Anonymous Sara Sue said...

Fishwreck has triggered the weirdest mental movie...disturbing & hilarious at the same time!

2:13 AM  
Blogger Rex L. Camino said...

One of my friends back in high school had a sister who was in charge of the casting for "Ernest Goes to Jail". I lobbied hard for a cameo but did not get it. She promised to try to work me in on later Ernest film but I didn't get those either. Then he died. Cherish your memories, CLC.

9:08 AM  
Blogger newscoma said...

Jim Varney was my acting coach for one night when I took acting lessons in Nashville.
He drove his own limo to the theater, which was next door to World's End on Church Street.
Varney said I had range.To his day I'm not sure if he meant talent or an oven range.
Did I mention he drove his own limo?

9:37 AM  
Blogger Lynnster said...

I didn't read this whole thing closely enough yesterday, it would seem. I have a similar condition to your harmonizing, except my friends call it Backup Chick Singer Disease or Syndrome. Which comes from pretty much as you might guess, I even wrote a blog entry about it in April 1998, heh. We played together off and on for 15+ years so there are really very few songs on radio stations or CDs I'd listen to that we'd never done before & I only sang lead on a few back in those days. But, I'll also do the "backup" on stuff we never played or new stuff. It just comes completely natural to me to sing along with the secondary vocal when I'm singing along with the radio or CD. Anyway, not exactly the same but a similar oddity, sounds like me, you and Sista have the harmony down pat, dunno who's gonna sing lead!

I see Sista is making fun of our toes, but really she is wishing she had extraordinary toes like me and you and nc.

10:33 AM  
Anonymous danelle said...

I HAVE to first watch the trailer for the movie I am watching too! I thought I was the only nut...

(Found you via NaBloPoMo randomizer, fyi)

3:57 AM  
Blogger saraclark said...

Damn you people are freaks. But in the best possible way. It's on now.

10:31 AM  
Anonymous sista said...

FYI, Lynnsta, I have nice of the few physical features of my person I'm ok with. Which reminds me, I need a pedicure.

1:40 PM  

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